Characteristics of a Battering Relationship

  1. He withholds approval, appreciation or affection as punishment.
  2. He continually criticizes you, calls you names, shouts at you.
  3. He ignores your feelings.
  4. He ridicules or insults your most valued beliefs.
  5. He is extremely jealous, harasses you about imagined affairs.
  6. He manipulates you with lies and contradictions.
  7. He insists you dress the way he wants.
  8. He humiliates you in private and/or in public.
  9. He insults you in private and/or public.
  10. He takes the car keys and/or money away from you.
  11. He subjects you to his reckless driving.
  12. He locks you out of the house.
  13. He abuses pets to hurt you.
  14. He punches, shoves, slaps, bites, kicks, chokes, hits you.
  15. He rapes you.
  16. He threatens to kidnap the children if you leave.
  17. He threatens to keep the children away from you, to prove you an unfit mother.
  18. He threatens to commit suicide if you leave.
  19. He refuses to allow you to socialize.
  20. He threatens you with a gun, knife, or other weapon.
  21. He repeatedly tells you no one else cares about you but him.
  22. He tells you he treats you this way because he loves you.
  23. He tells you if you were a better wife he wouldn't have to treat you this way.
  24. He blames you for all of the family problems.
  25. He calls you at home several times a day to 'check up' on you.
  26. He doesn't allow subscriptions to the local newspaper or magazines.
  27. He lies to friends about you, about the relationship.
  28. He doesn't allow you to work, and complains about the amount of money you spend.
  29. He takes possession of your paycheck, giving you too little to run the household.
  30. He criticizes you for dressing up and criticizes you for looking unattractive.
  31. He becomes irrationally angry at your attempt to explain, discuss or defend.
  32. . . . and the list goes on and on and on . . .